What my son taught me after a HARD day

Being a mom is not a walk in the park. Each day brings a new set of challenges and we deal the best we can. Yesterday I had a day that was just tough from wake-up to bed-time. I have been trying to get up before Noah wakes up instead of having him as my alarm clock like I usually do. It helps me start my day and although it's hard waking up early some morning it is worth the little bit of peace.

Well, yesterday I woke up early and so did Noah. It was a hard day from breakfast on. I won't go into huge detail, but lets just say there were plenty of toddler tantrums and a possible make-over on said toddler who found my makeup (insert eye-roll emoji), but by nap time (that came an hour and a half early) I was feeling defeated and honestly in tears. My toddler had whooped my butt to say the least. The baby is currently crawling and into everything and spilling daddy's coffee wherever he leaves it (totally in her reach)...ya know whatever could go wrong was, or so it felt. Funny how our bad days don't seem that bad after a nights sleep and fresh perspective.

I know these hard days especially as Noah figures out how to deal with all his toddler emotions will happen more frequently, but it is taught me something important.
Kid's give us SO much grace. Like sooo much. Have you ever stopped to think about that? Noah can have a really hard day and I don't always handle it so well. I can lose my temper and yell, which I totally hate by the way but it happens. And can I just say that yelling doesn't even phase this kid so all it does it make me look dumb. ha. It's amazing that our kids never hold a grudge from our actions.  In fact, after our especially tough day Noah asked for "twinkle twinkle" one more time and I begrudgingly went back in while holding the baby and sang to him. He reached up and rubbed my arm while I sang almost to remind me that I am doing my best.

The truth is we're all going to have rough days as mamas, but it is so important to remember to give ourselves grace as well as our kids. We can all try a little harder the next day. Remember when you are down in the trenches of motherhood, I am right there with you. Though there are hard days there will be far more great days that I am so grateful to be home for.

My goal is to continue to wake up before the kids to start my day, have more patience, talk more calmly and work thru the hard parts of the day, because at the end of the day we are the example of what behavior should look like to our kids. We are the ones they will be around most and the ones they WANT to be around! So I am going to try to be the mom I'd want to be around too practicing grace in all my relationships.

A love letter to my two year-old

To my sweet boy,

Another year has flashed before my eyes and now you are TWO. I have watched you learn and grow into the smartest little toddler. I am thankful to you always for making me a mama. You will always be my first baby. You have taught me so much about motherhood and myself. You filled a hole in my heart I never knew was there. Both you and Siena have. I meant to write this shortly after your birthday but now that you've been 2 for two weeks and your sister is here, it's even sweeter to write. You are such a great big brother all ready!

I love how you're already trying to share your toys and play with Siena. You kiss her all day long, tell her you love her and are such a big helper!

I love your passion for all things sports even at only two years-old. If it involves a ball you are there! I love that you never give up. You try until you succeed! I am reminded daily that I should do the same. Never give up on my goals and dreams.



I love your kind heart and how you always tell daddy you love him when we leave the house without him. You never hesitate to express your love for us with big hugs. You tell Mimi and Grammie you love them without prompting when we hang up on facetime. You make me want to love more and to always tell everyone I love how I feel.

I love how your vocabulary is growing everyday, your love for dinosaurs, minions and elmo.

You are beginning to have the best manners and it makes me so proud! "Please" and "thank you" without being told is heaven to my ears.

You are stubborn as all heck but I know that means you will do great things in your life.

Your daddy is your best friend and I wouldn't have it any other way, but you do come running to mommy when your hurt or upset.

My hope for you is that you continue to grow into the well mannered, kind-hearted little boy that you are. I can't wait to see how much you grow and learn in this next year. It is truly the greatest gift in life to be able to be home with you everyday and not miss a single "first". My love for you grows more everyday. I know with each year that passes it will go by faster and faster but I promise to always slow down and truly have that quality time with you.

I hope you have the best year ever!


Love,
Mommy

Noah is TWO!

Ah, you guys I have a TWO YEAR-OLD! What?! How is this possible? Time has just flown by. I feel like we just took that sweet baby boy home and now here we are with a two year-old toddler who is wild and crazy, and now we're waiting for the arrival of his sister.
Noah brings us so much joy to our daily life. I can't even remember life before he was in it.

This year we decided not to do a big birthday party. We did a big party last year for his first birthday (check out his party here) and it was awesome, but this year we decided to focus on quality time and experience (even tho he won't remember himself) vs a party. Noah is all about "play, play, PLAY!" I can't tell you how many times a day he asks to go play. We heard about an amusement park that is two hours from our house called Gardaland, and it has a great area for toddlers so we knew he would be in "play" heaven. We went the weekend before his actual birthday because I was 36 weeks pregnant and we thought that should probably be the last time we travel that far from home. It was fun to start his birthday week off exactly the week before at the amusement park. Robbie's good friend joined us for the day and he loves Noah! He is actually who we are counting on to baby sit if I go into labor at night. Thank goodness for friends when family isn't close by!

Noah had SO much fun! He was asking to go on the big roller coasters! Such a little dare devil. He definitely gets that from his daddy. I was impressed with the amount of rides he was able to ride and all the play grounds they had. They even had a splash pad and another water area for kids but I didn't bring Noah's suit so we stuck to the play grounds and rides. We spoiled him with way too much sugar and a new basketball. He was such a good boy the whole day and the car ride there and back. He is still rear facing so sometimes long car rides can be rough but he watched his movies and did awesome!

It was a bit of a tight squeeze for daddy!! 

His actual birthday was the 27th and Robbie was able to get someone to cover his shift at work so he could spend the day with him. We woke up and Noah immediately found his birthday cup cakes I had made the night before. Before I could even get to the coffee maker he was holding one saying, "cake!" so I gave in and let him have one with breakfast. It's totally acceptable to have cake for breakfast on your birthday, right?? haha. Then we facetimed Mimi and Papa so they could sing to him. After he was done talking to them I made some pancakes in the shape of a number 2. So simple but so fun!!

We decided to let him open his gifts that morning so he could play with them all day. Oh man, this kid can rip through some wrapping paper like no body's business. He has def gained some skills since Christmas haha.

I am so proud of Noah's manners. He is full of "please" and "thank-you" without prompting and that made his birthday even sweeter. I am so proud of my big boy.
Even though he didn't understand that it was birthday he would tell you he is "TWO!" when you asked how old he was turning. He could def sense the excitement of the day. He was asking to go "bye-bye" and we told him after his nap we would be doing something fun. He was then asking to go "night-night" and woke up sooner than usual very happy! It's like he knew something fun was planned for him!

We took him bowling which is one of his favorite things to do. We had a couple friends join us which made it even more special for him. I am thankful for the friends we have made here. I know I mentioned that before, but for real. It is HARD making friends but especially overseas so the ones who show up at a moments notice really mean a lot.

Noah loves to give hugs!! :) 

The bowling alley allowed me to bring in his birthday cup cakes so we could sing to him. Otherwise it would have just been Robbie and I singing to him at home, which I am sure he would have still loved. I was really missing family when it came time to sing "Happy Birthday"! It just makes a little one's birthday so special. 

He has all of a sudden started loving elmo so I tried to make an Elmo cake from cupcakes. It's def not pinterest worthy and almost sent me into labor the night before from frustration haha but it did the job and Noah loved it. That's all that matters, right?? I am so not a decorator! 

We finished out the day with his request of pizza for dinner and a facetime call to Grammie. He opened his present from her and Grandpa and was so excited. Thank goodness for technology!! It is safe to say he had a fun birthday!! 

My Breastfeeding Tips

In honor of it being World Breastfeeding week I wanted to make a post about my breastfeeding journey and some tips that helped me. I learned a lot in the year I breastfed Noah and am excited to start the journey all over again with baby #2.

I had my hubby take some photos of one of the last nursing sessions I shared with Noah before we fully weaned and I am so thankful to have them. Now I have a reason to share a few with you all :) There really is nothing like that special bond while you nourish your babe. Especially since Noah isn't a cuddler it was an extra special time.

When Noah was brand new (like literally just born) he latched perfectly. It was pure bliss and then he slept all night and woke up a new baby who just could not latch correctly. I was in PAIN. It took 3 weeks for me to perfect his latching.
So TIP #1: GET HELP! don't give up if you're having a hard time. That is what lactation consultants are for and they're a God send! Ours helped me figure out the best positions and how to get him to latch properly to where he was getting fed well. The first three weeks he was a cranky boy. Little did I know he was hungry! His latch was too shallow so he wasn't getting the good hind milk to fill him up well. My PED just shrugged it off as colic. Again, thank the Lord for good lactation consultants! Also, so thankful for my husband. He was my second set of eyes and hands. He would help me make sure his lip was down, my positioning was correct etc. Seriously without him and my lactation consultant I would not have been successful early on. A solid support system is so vital!

TIP #2- Don't put too much pressure on yourself. Remember fed is best not one way or the other. I made the goal to make it to a year and I am happy I stuck with it but honestly it was HARD! Noah was a funny baby because he didn't use breastfeeding as a sleep prop (other than the very early days), comfort and didn't have a crazy attachment to it. He was fine with a bottle as well. I nursed during the day and pumped for a bedtime bottle to get him nice and full for sleeping. However my body was extremely sensitive to his needs. As he got older and nursed less and less my supply would drop. I never had over supply and I was a slave to that pump to get enough milk for the bottle. It probably wasn't necessary! But I was determined so I drank tons of water, took the supplements and pumped at least 3 times a day. Ya'll that pump travelled all over the world with us! I remember being in Paris and they had different outlets and I didn't have a convertor so I couldn't even use it haha. Oh man was I engorged in the morning!! Around 10 months when I was really struggling I was able to get a supplement from the Italian pharmacy: Domperidone (I believe that is what it is called) and it allowed me to get thru those last few months with a good supply and even get a little bit of milk in the freezer which I had never done before.

Tip #3- Stick with it. It gets easier. I promise! Noah was a slow nurser at the beginning and I would get frustrated. By the time I would get him fed, changed and ready to leave the house it would be time to eat again! Nursing in public wasn't my jam. I needed to see what I was doing and hold him with one hand and my boob with the other (small chested probs haha) so I tried to feed at home or the car. Eventually he became very efficient and it was easier to quickly nurse him wherever we were and hands free too!! Even in the line for the eiffel tower! haha 

Tip #4- Don't freak out if a nursing strike happens. At 9 months I probably could have weaned Noah with no problem. He just wasn't interested and would sometimes cry when I tried to nurse. I stuck it out tho and gave bottles when needed and eventually he was about it again. It's OK to supplement if you need. It doesn't make you a bad mom or your breastfeeding journey any less perfect. 

Tip #5- Trust your body and trust your baby. Our bodies have been feeding babies since the beginning of time. Don't doubt yourself. Do your best and enjoy the bonding experience. Don't allow it to stress you out. Remember it's your baby and you are the mama! Don't be pressured or feel like things have to be a certain way. If your goal is to breastfeed a month, 3 months, 6 months or 2 years you got this and it is possible!

I feel like when baby girl comes I will feel a lot more comfortable and experienced for our nursing journey but there is nothing like experiencing it for the first time with your first baby. Thankful for the support I had and reaching my goal. I hope a few of these tips helps you mamas out and lessens the pressure you feel if you had that feeling at all. You are enough and your baby is so lucky to have you!!